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The Corner Store Counselor

Ok, it's time for another PSA.  Because I haven't gone through a breakup in over a decade, I guess I kinda fell out of the loop as far as what "games" are currently being played, and was left off the mailing list to receive the newsletter containing all updates to the rules involved. When I first realized this, I was like, "Ok word, I've graduated to a new level of grown, the kids don't want to play with me anymore!"

Well folks, even if this is a phase in your life that you have moved past, apparently you have to stay abreast for the people in your life that haven't...

Breakups, especially ones with a TRUE bond, are never easy.  It's heartbreaking all around, even if you are not the one being dumped.  It causes strain not only on the relationship at hand, but those in close proximity as well.  Its sooo easy to dish out advice that says to run the streets and do whatever it takes to keep your mind off the situation.  We, as the outside observers can see so clear EXACTLY what needs to be done to end the scenario as quickly as possible and move on.  Yes, its alot easier to see perspective from the outside looking in, but is that advice you just dished out tailored to fit the friend you are offering counsel to; OR is this YOUR personalized remedy for transition from one relationship to another??!!

Anytime a relationship ends, it's NEVER about the person you are leaving, its all about YOU and the life you are choosing to lead.  With that being said, all this extra advice being dished out, solicited or not, is a waste of time.  All these ridiculous things we tell one another to attempt to get over it is unnecessary, because, at the end of the day, these are all things that fix US, the person giving the advice.  What someone needs at those times is what will fix THEM, which only they know.  Whatever they decide to do MUST come from that individual, because you should be completely free of blame or blemish in a scenario.  Whatever an outcome of another's situation, it should NEVER be based off what you instructed them to do.  Your job isn't to nurse the hurt of the situation, but the wounded individual.  Surround them with things and events that represent them at their best self, reminding them of just how great they are.  DO NOT, I REPEAT, DO NOT address the breakup and how to proceed, that's NONE of your business, even if you are asked!!

Stop thinking you know what's best for someone else's love life, YOU DON'T!!  Understand the only ones that get to weigh in are the 2 people in it.  If we stop feeling obligated to fix things that we didn't break in the first place, it would be a whole lot easier to be the type friend we were born to be, Loving, Supportive, Objective, and Loyal.  This will be me from now on, what's up with you though??!! ~The Queen~ 


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